Current Sales Report

Total Sales of all my Books: 211 Goal: 100000|Thank you for buying my books. If you haven't bought one, go ahead and buy a book to make my day!

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Dealing with Dogs Part 1 (D-D-D-D-Deworm!)

Does everybody know what time it is? TOOL TIME! (ah, a good show back in the day)
Actually, no. It's random blog posting time!
Anyway, denizens of the Internet, I recently discovered something new at!
As you probably know (I feel like I've said this one million times), I've got my books up on that site. It used to be on the Featured Ebooks, right on the homepage...but those days are long gone (it's been about a week).
I was kind of bummed out about it since the number of downloads took a nose dive.
But now I've found out that they have a new category--Top 10 ebooks!
And guess what book is in the top 10 fiction? *cups hand over ear*
*crickets chirp* *mice squeak*
*cockroaches continue to be disgusting little vermin that needs to be stepped on, burned and vaporized*
You don't know? You don't want to guess? Fine, I'll just spoil it. THE JUDGE! THE JUDGE IS IN THE TOP TEN!
Dun, dun, duuuun!
Not impressed? Well, I thought it was cool. I'm not going to get into stats anymore (trying to quit. cutting the cold turkey.). But let's just say that the downloads have been going back up! Hooray!
Anyway, let's get down to business with a topic I'd like to call: Dealing with Dogs.
I've got a dog. She was just a little puppy last year. Now...she's a huge puppy. But that's beside the point.
For you people who consider getting a dog, I thought I'd give a few life lessons.

First of all, if your dog is a puppy...make sure you deworm (unworm?) it. This is not a pleasant topic. But it's a very real topic. Worms live inside the INTESTINES! Put your hands over your ears and say "lalalalala... I'm not listening" if you don't want to hear more(like that'll help). It doesn't matter where your puppy came from. It doesn't matter if the mommy dog has no worms. Your puppy can still have worms. WHY? Mother nature. apparently, even if your dog is dewormed, some eggs or something can still be living in there...only to show up during child--er--puppy birth. Disgusting? Vile? Putrid? Despicable? Say what you will. Doesn't change the facts. Some people are against over-the-uh-store de-wormers. But here at CC, we used one and it worked like a charm. Our puppy looked like it was pregnant even though it was like two weeks old. But now...ah...those pesky worms are gone. Those...things...that look like doodoo.

For God's sake, do not google image those worms! DO NOT DO IT! PLEASE!

I'd continue talking about these tips. But...right now...I kind of want to throw up.
and perhaps go to the bathroom for some other things that nature calls my cellphone for.
Maybe next time I'll continue with some more...pleasant topics.
Until next time, denizens of the Internet.... Until next time...